Thursday, September 10, 2009
and I love you so
Dear friends,
At this time last year, I was also an excited bride-to-be. My husband and
I were keen on looking for ways to make sure that we will have the
wedding of our dreams may it be by attending as much bridal fairs as we
can, going to Divisoria on weekends and being as much hands-on as we can.
We succeeded. On August 8, 2008, my husband and I were married in
Antipolo Cathedral and it was the happiest day in our lives. After the
wedding, we moved to an apartment immediately and experienced the
independent and carefree life of a newlywed couple. We traveled, went to
malls and enjoyed life's simple pleasures like cuddling on DVD nights or
doing the grocery on payday or eating burger at midnight or doing the
house chores while playing loud music.
(Embedded image moved to file: pic12760.jpg)
But everything crashed on May 1 this year. Eight months through our
marriage, my husband had a heart attack while swimming during our company
outing. There was no premonition. We really didn't expect it. Although he
had a family history of heart conditions, he was so fit and healthy. I
couldn't find words to describe what I feel - anger, pain, guilt.... He
passed away at the time when we were so in love and had so much hope for
the future. We didn't even have the chance to have kids together. I am
still in pain. I am still grieving. I have my good days when I can
appreciate the blessings in spite of the tragedy. But most of the time I
have my bad days when I feel like tearing my hair out and just cry myself
to sleep. It is especially difficult now because our first wedding
anniversary is coming up. I keep remembering how my husband and I would
talk about how we would spend it and where we would travel to celebrate
it. Thinking about that day really scares me.
But I am writing not to paint a grim picture of my life. I am sharing
this because I would like to point out five lessons in our love story
which hopefully would do some good for married couples, even future ones
too.
· Never waste your time with petty quarrels - Although our
married life was happy, we were not a perfect couple. We also have our
petty quarrels like tampuhan over who would prepare our meal or for not
being able to text at the right time or for being 30 minutes late. We 'd
not talk for some time until during the wee hours in the morning when we
were both in bed then he would reach out and hug me then say, "bati na
tayo." Oh how I wish I could bring back the time and not even bother with
these petty things. Never ever let a day pass without patching things up
and talking it over. Now I realize that I should have said sorry more
often.
· Offer words of affirmation - I remember how we would often ask
each other: do you love me or are you happy with me? It was good that we
did this because right now, his words of affirmation keep me going
whenever I am on the verge of depression. Besides, expressing your love
and your happiness will add strength to yo ur relationship.
· Find joy out of simple things - Always show your partner that
you appreciate him - whether it's a phone call during the day to say
hello, or buying lugaw for pasalubong, or cooking his favorite meal. And
when he does some thing for you, don't forget to say thank you even for
little things. As they say, familiarity breeds contempt - don't fall into
that trap.
· Always make memories - Our time was short but for me, every
minute was in color. Every word exchanged, every place we've been to and
every restaurant we ate at were all deeply etched on my mind. It helped
that we had our websites and albums to document our life together. Our
first purchase as a couple was a digital camera and it was so well-used
that we were able to build 6 albums of pictures in such a short time.
· Express your love - A hug, a touch in the head, a peck on the
cheek - there are so many ways to express your love. But most
importantly, verbalize it. Saying "I love you" as much as you can will
not only make your partner feel good but will also inspire him.
We were married on 888 and spent 8 months together as husband and wife.
Yes, I still feel rotten and empty at times. But I have hope in the
future and trust in the Lord. I will survive this. My husband's life was
short but it was a life well-lived. But I believe in our love and I
believe that we will see each other again - in God's time. God bless all
of you.
Roanna (ni Jarwin)
8-8-8 | Antipolo Cathedral
Sunday, September 6, 2009
A well loved Night-out
It was really a beautiful Friday night with my former co-employees in CAD Remittance Dept.(RCBC) a night out which started only as a major reunion three years ago then became our way of staying in touch with each other. The first reunion we had which we celebrated at La Tiera Hotel in Makati on November 30, 2006 was a huge success. It was followed by a "despedida" party for Mam Lennie (my ever favorite boss)who retired from her work after so many fruitful years she had spent with RCBC along with Macel Bathan who accepted a big offer by another bank. We had it last March 2008 at SMX-MOA Dampa site a very famous place in Manila nowadays where "Paluto" is their way of making customers enjoy fresh dishes straight from its market. The third one, I joined the planning but unfortunately I missed the event which I really regret it coz' it was my sweet friend Baby Panganiban's farewell party for us who left the bank for a greener pasture in another corporate world. Well, I guess some guys are lucky enough...It was a rainy Friday Night when I arrived late (as always) in Glorietta where we decided to make the event happened. As I went inside the sumptuous place of DaD's (the buffet was superb), I saw the old familiar places wearing bright faces as everyone was smiling at each other as if one has found her long lost friend. The food was great but the most beautiful thing that happened was the nice conversation, the nice stories told and the "question and answer" portion which everyone cannot help to ask "how was everything?" Although we were not able to get the best attendance, the night was unforgettable . We took nice shots of our group and we also enjoyed the smartness of Savvy, Chrisy Gatmen's lovely dottie. As we wrapped up the night saying goodbye's and good nights with each other, we agreed to have a repeat of this lovely event. My gratitude to Ma'am Lennie, Ma'am Edith (another favorite boss of mine)and Ma'am Christy who shared their blessings who made that night so yummy and also to my former colleagues who stayed as good friends of mine. Well guys I really miss your company and the most beautiful thing happened in my entire life with RCBC, I am sure that I only had it with you. I find it kind of funny when I would dream that we can go back to the times where we worked together not only as associates but as a close family. It makes me feel sad everytime I think of youand all the things in the past. But, I am so thankful that I met you and had spent some wonderful years with you.;)
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